Roxanne the Adorable African Grey

Roxanne the Adorable African Grey
Wouldn't you like to work for me?

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Micco and the Rabbit Hole

So much has changed since my last post, I feel like I fell down the rabbit hole with Alice.

We moved again.   Oh, not to some classy place like  Boca or even Vero, where I would be appreciated and admired.  No, we moved to Micco.  You don't even have to say it --- I've already covered it, and it's not on the map.  Just tell your friends I am 4 miles south of Grant.  Unfortunately, I don't think Grant is on the map either.

Now don't get me wrong, we finally got an outdoor enclosure as promised -- but it certainly could use my decorative touch.  Well, what can I say?  I do my best with what is given me.

You can't believe how quiet the past 3 weeks have been.  Joe the Toy Maker and my Executive Assistant/Slave decided that taking care of all of us was simply too difficult.  Of course, I was safe from the cut.  It had to be a toss-up between RIP and Silvio.  If you guessed the screeeeecher lost out, Bingo!

Funny thing about quiet-it's highly over-rated.  This place was more like a tomb than a room.  With Silvio away at MARS (  for what appears to have been a spa vacation, I almost forgot how to curse.

Well, the surprise is on me. My assistants actually missed that pain-in-the-tail feathers.  When I awoke from this afternoon's nap, who should be coming through the door but Silvio (aka Cracker), umbrella top-knot standing up like the headdress of a drag queen in Vegas.  I saw that on Criminal Minds late one night through a peep hole I chewed in my blanket.  Do you think that may be one reason the office is being turned into our sleep room?  No, surely not.  Maybe all the screeching and resultant cursing has something to do with it.  Then again, the office IS quite colorful and it is high time my ES figured out I'm worth it.

From now on, Silvio gets a stay-cation and I get the spa treatment.  Don't they know who I am??  I'm encouraged that my fans are more perceptive.

This is Roxanne echoing to you from the edge of the rabbit hole until next time my ES is willing to type for me or I get the voice recognition software I ordered. Late night TV and the Shopping Network are a dangerous duo in my talons.

Friday, April 12, 2013

Job Opportunity May Be Coming Soon!

FANS: If you love me, and want to hear from me more often, you may need to post some encouraging words on facebook.

Let me tell you now ----- If I can't get my 'Executive Secretary' to be more efficient and professional, I will reluctantly begin the tedious process of interviewing for new help.

There is one point in her favor.  Yesterday she received 3 cookbooks from that are totally dedicated to recipes for parrots!  I see this as a positive sign that she is trying to ingratiate herself, and none too soon.

Admittedly, Joe the Toy Maker has had his ups and downs, what with back surgery and an appendectomy, and now rehabilitation and massage --- but it must be reaffirmed that the pecking order around here has not changed because of obvious human frailties.  They come with the host. Humans simply don't live as long as we, due to complications I can't begin to understand.  Still, I watch him make birdie toys almost every night, and I must admit his skills are rapidly improving.  Trying to amuse me is a full-time job.

I must say, I am enjoying the jungles that my assistants made for me and my two brothers. We are able to be outside our cages for long periods of time, and since they removed the carpeting under us, we can poop wherever we like!  One thing my 'ES' is good at is cleaning and sanitizing after the poop hits the concrete.

I have heard talk of plans to make outdoor flight cages but have not seen anything on paper.  I should be the first consulted since I am, after all, one that can actually fly. My brothers are getting better at gliding. But full flight is my purview and should never be forgotten.  Since moving to Grant we have all regrown our flight feathers.  It's simply too windy all the time to let us fly outside over the Indian River.  Not to mention the hawks and bald eagles that swoop around the place catching fish and the occasional squirrel.  But an outdoor flight aviary?  Oh please, be still my fluttering heart.

New pictures will hopefully follow this post, so you can see me at my best, up in my jungle.  I make no promises.  I'm still trying to figure out how to type with talons.  If my ES ever puts voice recognition software on this baby, she will doom herself to obsolescence as my blogger.  One can only hope. Then she can spend more time in the kitchen whipping up birdie goodies while I do as I please.  To paraphrase Joseph Campbell, I will then be able to follow my bliss. (That sometimes involves chewing up art supplies.)

Sunday, August 12, 2012

The Usual Prevening Riot

Good prevening to all you Big Bang Theory fans out there (too early to be called evening, thus, prevening).  By the way, if you are not a huge fan of The Big Bang Theory, what are you thinking?  Oh Wait --- you are NOT thinking!

Prevening, and here I am eating leftovers again.  Well, to be honest, my bowl of extruded parrot pellets was 'freshened up' by my Executive Assistant.  Translation:  'freshened up' = dump in a few more of the same chunks and stir, while making 'cutzy noises' in an attempt to distract me from the obvious --- SSDD.  
Ah well, it works on my brothers.  I'm holding out, because I know I shall soon be receiving my good-night treat, or as Silvio calls it 'night night tweetzy, oh yea  .Oh My God Twitzy twizy twitzy time".  You get the picture, but you can't possibly feel my pain.  He is a screeeeeeecer.
1 really need to help him work on his diction.

Speaking of diction -- RIP has come a long way.  He actually has a wee conversation with me now. It goes something like this:

Roxy: RIP, you ok?
RIP: I ok. You ok?
Roxy: Yep, I'm ok.  You ok, Buddy?
RIP: I ok.  You ok?
ad nauseam

Around here we take what we can get.  It's an improvement over the interminable 'HeyHeyHeyHeyHey' and 'RIPRIPRIPRIPRIP'.

He's a challenge, that's for sure. But he does try, bless his heart.  (That's a southern expression roughly translated 'dumb as dirt but sweet'.)

Then there's Silvio.  What can I say?  Ah yes--- Joe was listening to the radio, and I heard what can only be meant to be Silvio's theme song: LET'S START A RIOT by Three Day's Grace.  Google it, and feel my pain.

It is approaching the evening and darker than usual due to the rainy day we are experiencing.  I wonder if my native Congo is as humid as central Florida.  I'll have to google that tomorrow; not that I would consider moving to a country about which I know little--- but knowledge for its own sake can be helpful.  For instance, when Sheldon was trying to explain the concept of Schrodinger's Cat to Penny, I was right on top of that.  Just glad it wasn't Schrodinger's Parrot.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

To all my fans out there wondering if I had flown the coop, I can only say when you aren't exacting during the interview process, you may end up with an executive assistant like mine.

Moving to Grant, FL has been a trip.  I love my new room with a view of the Indian River, and all the activity I can watch all day.  My brothers aren't behaving AS badly, most of the time.  Lots to see and do, however... my assistant has been so busy decorating, organizing, and gardening that my own needs for self-expression have fallen low on her list of priorities.  It's only to be expected; she has the attention span of a gnat.

I believe it is safe to say that, having wrestled control back from her, I will be center stage once again on a  more regular basis.  We have re-negotiated the terms of her contract, and per that conversation, you will be hearing a LOT more of me.

Friday, January 13, 2012

NOW We're Talkin'!

I'm 'on the fly', so to speak, getting in a quick message before my brother, Cracker starts to Alarm the household.  Joe is snoring, so my Executive Assistant is available, albeit unwilling.

We are MOVING!

Either that, or this apartment has become a 'Mail and More'.

Grant, Florida: Current Population-1841, perched upon the island-bejeweled Indian River, below where it merges with the Banana River at the tip of Merritt Island.

Sounds all tropical and breezy, right?  So that's the excuse for my long absence from you, my many fans.  Our little house (so I've heard) has a 'Florida Room' that is 'for the birds', facing the Indian River (well, at least a boat ramp and parking lot thereon), that will be loaded with bird-friendly palms and other flora, playtrees, toys and treats.  We--Shall--See!

But I had to take this opportunity to introduce you to my new hero, Einstein the Texas African Grey!  She is now connected to my PLOG! (Word has gotten out that I, Rosanne, am online!)  I get to watch her videos at least once a day!  She is now my roll model.  If you need a good laugh, visit her web site.  She is Amazing! Best of all, she looks like ME, and after all, it IS all about ME, isn't it?

Hoping to be back to entertain you soon --- I am now going to slip back under my cover in the hope that Cracker didn't hear nails clicking on the laptop keys.  I'm fine, but take my word for it, my Executive Assistant R-E-A-L-L-Y needs more beauty sleep.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

HO HO ho-hum .... Holly Daze??? POOP!


I have never seen such ineptitude! Well, yes I have, but really, is that any excuse? I have been full of myself for 2 weeks and not a single opportunity to post on my own plog.

WANTED: An Executive Assistant that will work for crumbs!

Is that too much to ask?

She's been making 'chop' (parrot veggie mix), cleaning cages, floors and bowls, making holiday greeting cards, ordering bird toy parts, doing laundry (and no, I do NOT accept any responsibility for her bad timing where poop is concerned), decorating for something called Holly Daze, and generally ignoring my creative needs.

I don't get this entire Holly Daze thing.  More work for HER, less time for ME.  As I see it, what's to celebrate?

WAIT A MINUTE!!  I spy bright colored plastic and wooden shapes, strips of leather, cotton twine sticking out of the just-opened UPS box.  WooHoo!!!

Maybe this SANDY CLAWZ guy I keep hearing about will come through again this year and show up with some rad toyz!